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Friday, September 3, 2010

Crime, Celebrity and Can't Get Right...

By now it's the charge heard 'round the world. Five months of street time and everybody's favorite diminutive rapper has found himself within the grasp of the criminal justice system with barely time enough to sire PostPrisonBaby #1. And this time, he's ensure conjugals. September 1, 2010, following a jail stint on a weapons charge, TI (Clifford Harris) and his recently married wife Tameka "Tiny" Cottle (of Tiny & Toya "fame")  were arrested on suspicion of possessing methamphetamine. Arresting officers report detaining the couple after smelling what they suspected was marijuana during a routine traffic stop. As of this posting, the couple posted $10,000 bail following the arrest and were released.
Obviously, TI isn't the first celebrity with an arrest record that includes multiple charges or substance abuse, nor will he be the last. What makes this situation noticeable, is the speed with which Mr. Harris seems willing to hand his freedom over to the prison industrial complex. And before the conspiracy theorist (of which I am a card holding member) begins to protest and design their "FREE T.I." t~shirts, I'm going to go out on a limb and speculate that perhaps we doth protest too much, too loudly, too often and for the wrong reasons.









I'm able to spot innocence a mile a way. It's a natural gift, second sight type thing. In fact, I know within five seconds of looking at a person, whether the human I'm looking at is justifiably free of malice, harm or guilt. Innocent people have this air about them (and it smells like fresh linens and baby powder). I'm going to tell you how to identify them as this is a pretty useful little tool to add to your interpersonal communication arsenal. Innocent people are usually short...(extremely), with cherubic, tweekable cheeks, uncontrollable spit bubbles forming between pre~verbal lips with a craving for mother's milk that borders on obsessive. They sport fashionable onesie ensembles; complete with strollers, car seats and sometimes a binky. Get it? Babies are innocent, despite those late night howling sessions designed to enhance your viewing of all things Nick At Nite.

As we grow and mature, we do some pretty questionable stuff. There's the decidely lascivious outfit worn to the office Christmas party around the same time as your yearly pay review by supervisor McPervert. There's the questionable decision to "rescue" (and keep) abandoned shrubbery for your front yard from the recently abandoned pasta place near your house (and barren frontyard). There's even the time (or two) that you may (or may not)  have allegedly (and unwitnessed by the naked human eye) been in the vicinity of the friend who briefly smelled of something reminiscent of cannabis sativa and a more significant whiff of Black Love incense...(allegedly). We're grown. We mess up and live to see another day, hopefully. The problem? Ongoing recidivism, especially when your finances and celebrity offer you an opportunity to avoid capture. Roman Polanski  do better!

This is the thing. After TI's Behind The Music and an explanation of events leading to the gun charge, some of us were willing to make a concession to a brother who kinda hand me believing it when he said:

No more stress, now I'm straight, now I get it, now I take
Time to think, before I make mistakes just for my family's sake
That part of me left yesterday
The heart of me is strong today
No regrets I'm blessed to say
The old me dead and gone away

What can I say, I'm gullible, but now I'm going to preemptively put my "FREE T.I" shirt on hold...indefinitely. And offer some unsolicited (and completely unnoticed) advice:  When freshly released from prison. Go straight home with a police escort. Ask said officer to enter your premises BEFORE YOU STEP FOOT THROUGH THE DOOR and agree to a search of said premises, including your car, truck, da Range, Hummer, plane, helicopter, rocket and that contraption in The Fly that aided teleportation. When and only after this is complete should you step your shower shoe wearing, fresh out a jumpsuit, still sporting the lockdown line up haircut into your own home. Once there...throw out ANYBODY who wasn't arrested during the search or be prepared to do a cavity search. Read a couple of scripts, hang out in your studio, game room, pool...hell, call Tyler Perry , find something in your freedom to cherish and don't let go.

Freedom ain't free...and (alleged) possession of  meth doesn't make you a political prisoner...

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