Friends...How Many Of Us...

Somebody has been working overtime on the new Friendship Meme that states, "I don't trust a girl with no girlfriends". And while I can agree with this concept in theory, I gotta admit. I at a loss in this department. Don't misunderstand, I have female friends, I just don't have a gaggle of high heel wearing, thong showing, flirty faced, Glee watching, Sex In The City mimicking magpies with which to wile away the "Free Before Midnight~Freak'Um Dress~Lady's Night" contingency that women are commonly thought to have. (Nor do I want that...but that's another bucket of fish to fry for another day...let's stick to the point for once!)
The worse place I can be is on a comfy couch, watching my 26th episode of Iron Chef and Family Guy (I'm a natural multi~tasker), lap top located lap adjacent, when my phone rings. It is the truest fact of my years, that I am an immovable object destined for perpetual rest when I'm comfortable...think Steve Harvey's flat top, set in concrete. So, when my phone rang and I hear the cheery voice of my rebirthed childhood friend, I looked at the phone for a full two rings before deciding to answer. Allow me to explain (and change the names to protect the innocent... culpable...integrity of the story...). Pandora, is bubbly, effusive, expressive and excitable, unless she's not. And when she's not, she has the common decency not to call. This explains why we're great friends. It also explains why I gave the phone such a sideways glance. I knew she was feeling "social" in direct competition to my "anti~social", but I answered anyway...variety is the spice of life and whatnot!

"Hey, whatchoo doin'?"

"Sitting on the couch, brooding, being sedentary, listening to my hair grow."

"Let's go for sushi!"

"No."

"Okay."

See how cool she is?!!!
Which brings me to point number one: I ain't gotta explain SHIGGITY to nobody I'm not in a congressional relationship with! This is how I know that Pandora is lifelong friendship material as opposed to somebody who complimented me on my hair in the bathroom at the grocery store. (Yes, women form friendships just that quickly!). The fact that I didn't have to go into my song and dance about, "I'm just tired, I don't feel like putting all this in a bra and balancing it on high heels, my nose feels old MJ wide..." I could just say no and the world didn't end, no hissy fit was thrown, the validity of our friendship was unthreatened and the butterflies kept right on flitting along.

"Hey, dawg...how long are you in town, anyway...maybe we can go next week."
"I'll be here for a while...whenever you're ready mayne, I'm down like senior citizen boobs!"
(Sidenote 1.0: Yes, we talk like intellectual hood frat boys. It's part of the charm!)

A quick trip to the fridge, a consult of the TV Guide and the side eye I'd been giving my Significant Other all morning led to a couple of quick epiphanies. The couch would always be there...

"You know what? Gimme 20 minutes...let's GO!"

45 minutes later...we're blazing down the freeway talking and laughing...and internally, I know this is going to turn into an all day affair! (And I'm giddy about it!). Driving, riding, singing and playing catch up leads me to point number two: One of the things I've yet to mention, is that with the exception of the occasional Facebook comments...Pandy and I hadn't seen, talked, texted each other in months. And we both like it that way. She travels because of work, but before this was her way of life...it was generally the same. (Except that one year in 2007 when we lived in the same apartment complex, much to the chagrin of both of our livers.) We don't have the kind of relationship that requires an umbilical cord. Years ago, we developed a complex series of codes and flailing hand gestures that signal significant emotional unrest, so all that constant checking in is absolutely annoying ...archaic and unnecessary. I've never understood the importance of calling me to tell me you "parted your hair on the left side, thereby realizing that your right eye sports a larger pupil than the other one, which led to the amazing coincidence that you walk sideways when you wear the turquoise bra with white daisies, which your boyfriend hates, but your lover thinks is cute and why doesn't he answer your text message..."
SHUT THE HELL UP!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I digress and you get my point. Life is full of minutiae...it doesn't require narration.

I'll begin the fast forward wrap up about now, because at this point, we began to engage in sippage, prophesy and the intellectual root canals that we're famous for all over Houston. But I will give a shout out to what I'll lovingly think of as Road Tour 2010.

First stop: Miyako's for sushi and plumtini's where we began to slowly dissect our general funk and malaise over a beautifully marinated mushroom salad. The conclusion: (from her) "Get more consistent with the blog dammnit!" (from me) "Move ya arse to New York...they need you!" Next stop: Houston's own Beaucoup Bar and Grill (3102 Old Spanish Trail) which involved something I lovingly call "a double shot", insightful conversation, and a chance for some tag team inspiration (we hope) to a new addition to my blog and friend's list. (Oh yeah...and a HILARIOUS revelation about the things we hide from ourselves.) Next: A trip to Xpozher (3005 West Loop South Freeway) to satisfy some ring envy and prompt new ideas. On to tea at Andre Thierry (2515 River Oaks Blvd), which I should pause to anoint as my new favorite place to crack the shell on the smoothest, most emotionally satifying creme brulee I've had in quite a while. At which point, we decided that a late lunch wasn't sufficient to punctuate the potential hilarity of our warm personalities. So I say, "We gotta make this a DAY and NIGHT...lemme holla at HunnyBunny and..." Without letting me finish, she said, "Let's drive back to your place, check in and change clothes!"

Point number three: Ms. Pandora Q. Perfection is currently single...(I'll be passing her number around later...). Said that to say this, despite being all I-N-D-E-P-E-N-D-E-N-T, strong and grown, I value my relationship. And so does she. Had this descended into some combination of eye/neck/shoulder rolling about me being a "grown arsed woman who ain't got to answer to/check in with nobody"...I would have kindly shown my friend the back of my head as I beat a hasty retreat. In fact, the majority of the scant "chick friends" I have, ended in just this way. It's not the commonly thought, "that heffa was after my man so I had to cancel her like Nino" mindset that I run into. It's an inability to value what I value. And I value him...so we checked in, I pecked his cute big ol' head and we continued the tour.

Pandy can sing. Scratch that, Pandy SANGS like nobody breathing has a right to. (No Randy Watson). I sing about as well as Stevie Wonder sees. We decided on karaoke at MacLounge (11322 Westheimer), for some late night bellowing. Did I mention that she's also an unrepentant ham actress and when properly motivated (cough: Hennessy Black) can put on a show that leaves strangers and friends alike screaming with laughter? I, on the other hand, can be kinda reserved around strangers and prefer talking mad, crazy noise in the back of my head (while it's being read on my face). She can, and does often, compel absolute strangers to bear their souls, psyches and dance through their most embarrassing moments in front of a spotlighted camera. I, on the other hand could care less about whether Tommy Twinkle and the Raylettes are having a good time. I don't know them! Opposites attract...and more importantly, they let each other be. We all know it's not the quantity, but the quality of a thing that matters, but when you find this in the flesh of a real friend. Other's pale in comparison.
Thanks, comment and shout out to real friends!